I think it would be great to have gay children. Don’t get me wrong I’ll obviously still love my children straight or gay but hear me out on this one. I mean think of how easy the teenage years would be. If your son were gay you wouldn’t have to worry about him knocking up some girl when they were too young. And by the same token if your daughter were gay you wouldn’t have to worry about her getting knocked up! Babies would come at the appropriate time in their lives. IVF and adoption are expensive, teenagers can’t afford that! Yay for gay teenagers!
Ok so I’m being facetious but that’s how I deal with some of the more serious things in life – through humor. I think the heteros really need to give gay people a break. I mean put yourself in their shoes. Really think about it. If most of society defined you (not to mention infringing upon your civil rights on a daily basis) and were constantly obsessed with what you did in the bedroom and with whom wouldn’t that piss you off? Maybe be a little creepy? Frankly it sounds perverted to me. I don’t want to know what anyone else is doing in the bedroom gay or straight. It’s none of my business. And to me what someone does or doesn’t do in the bedroom and with whom doesn’t dictate what they do with the rest of their lives.
If you’re reading this and you’re straight does what you do in the bedroom rule your thoughts in every other aspect of your life? I’m sure you’re able to focus on your job, be a good parent, a positive influence on your friends’ kids, etc. without thinking about what you’re going to be doing in the bedroom with your partner later on. So why do we place that crap on gay people? Just like heteros, it’s only one aspect of who they are.
If either of my children were gay I couldn’t love them any less than I do now. It breaks my heart to even imagine telling one of my children that I didn’t love them anymore because of who they truly are. To me it’s the same as telling them I don’t like your eye color, I think it’s weird so I don’t love and accept you. Yes I think it’s the same thing. You’re born a certain way. Just as you have no control over your eye color, you don’t have control over your sexual orientation either.
How do I know that it’s not a choice? Well let me pose this question to all of the non-believing heterosexuals out there. Think back for a moment to the time that you sat there and made a conscious choice to like the opposite sex. I want you to think back to the day that you actually really thought about it and said hmmm should I like boys or girls? What? You mean you didn’t make a conscious decision to like the opposite sex? You just did? It was just something that you always knew and felt? Well that’s what it’s like for gay people, it’s not a decision that they just decided to make on a whim one day. It’s just something that they always knew and felt and it just was.
I’m not naïve, I know there are so many societal issues around this subject and maybe it’s not so easy as just saying it’s ok I accept you for who you are, or maybe it is that easy? If you tell your child you don’t accept them for who they are, do you really mean it or are you doing it because you’re worried about what your neighbors, friends or religious affiliation will think of you knowing that you love your child no matter what. Wow what a concept! Accepting and loving your child for who they are, not who you want them to be. Isn’t that what being a parent is all about? Societal rules aside, what does your heart tell you is right? After all if your child is gay, they’re still the same person that you’ve known and loved for however many years, they’re just gay. (And if you’re hanging out with people who would rather see you crush your child’s spirit by telling them how unworthy they are of your love, rather than accepting the fact that they’re gay, then you really should find nicer people to hang out with). There are a lot of us in society who would applaud you for loving and accepting your gay child. Not because being gay is weird and you’re so great because you “accept” your weird child but because you accept your child for the entire person that they are. Period. And we would think you’re pretty awesome for that too. We all want to be loved and accepted for all that we are especially by our parents.
(Note to readers: If you don’t agree with me, and trust me I know that there are plenty of people who won’t, please don’t leave any nasty comments. I don’t expect everyone to love what I have to say but please keep any comments respectful. If you really can’t help yourself then start your own blog like I did and get your opinions out there. What this world needs is more love. If we all accepted each other for who we truly were this world would be a much better place).
(Find me on Twitter @JennGDonohue)